Comments on: How to Handle Tough Love http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/ Building Intimate Business Relationships Fri, 30 Dec 2011 20:50:21 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: admin http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/comment-page-1/#comment-2027 admin Sat, 27 Jun 2009 07:25:54 +0000 http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/#comment-2027 @Jackie – I completely agree with you about giving out tough love. There are times when I’ve really cared about someone who I felt the only way I could really get through to them was ‘tell them the cold hard truth,’ but I never brought myself to do it because I worried internally how they would react and if that would adversely affect our relationship. At the end of the day, it all worked out for them, but I was probably doing them a disservice. As nice as you are though, I bet it’s something you really struggle with. @Jackie – I completely agree with you about giving out tough love. There are times when I’ve really cared about someone who I felt the only way I could really get through to them was ‘tell them the cold hard truth,’ but I never brought myself to do it because I worried internally how they would react and if that would adversely affect our relationship.

At the end of the day, it all worked out for them, but I was probably doing them a disservice. As nice as you are though, I bet it’s something you really struggle with.

]]> By: admin http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/comment-page-1/#comment-2026 admin Sat, 27 Jun 2009 07:25:37 +0000 http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/#comment-2026 @Jamie – Welcome to RSM. So glad you decided to spend the time to contribute to the conversation. Some people have the innate ability to really be self-driven, but nobody gets anywhere near the proverbial top without the help of trusted friends, family, advisors, etc. For people that aren’t self driven tough love CAN, if done right, help you keep pushing through life’s minutiae. Or sometimes it can help us get back on track. We all get stuck sometimes. @Jamie – Welcome to RSM. So glad you decided to spend the time to contribute to the conversation. Some people have the innate ability to really be self-driven, but nobody gets anywhere near the proverbial top without the help of trusted friends, family, advisors, etc.

For people that aren’t self driven tough love CAN, if done right, help you keep pushing through life’s minutiae. Or sometimes it can help us get back on track. We all get stuck sometimes.

]]> By: admin http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/comment-page-1/#comment-2025 admin Sat, 27 Jun 2009 07:25:22 +0000 http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/#comment-2025 @Stuart – I love that you disguise your real, genuine ‘edginess’ as sarcasm, but I read your “How to be a Dick,” post on SME and know better. I think internalizing the situation/advice FIRST is really important. I’m as guilty as the next person as being mad for 30 minutes before actually gleaning insight from the situation. @Stuart – I love that you disguise your real, genuine ‘edginess’ as sarcasm, but I read your “How to be a Dick,” post on SME and know better. I think internalizing the situation/advice FIRST is really important. I’m as guilty as the next person as being mad for 30 minutes before actually gleaning insight from the situation.

]]> By: Carlos Miceli http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/comment-page-1/#comment-1635 Carlos Miceli Mon, 18 May 2009 21:03:40 +0000 http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/#comment-1635 This is a thinker (and a great post!). I want to clarify that it's a huge "it depends", just like you say, but after all, I have to admit that a little vengeance has been a huge motivator for me more than once. I like to believe that I can focus on the message, but taking the challenge and defying the ones that don't believe in you has always been a very thrilling way of giving my best. This is a thinker (and a great post!).

I want to clarify that it’s a huge “it depends”, just like you say, but after all, I have to admit that a little vengeance has been a huge motivator for me more than once.

I like to believe that I can focus on the message, but taking the challenge and defying the ones that don’t believe in you has always been a very thrilling way of giving my best.

]]> By: Jackie http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/comment-page-1/#comment-1621 Jackie Thu, 14 May 2009 14:43:44 +0000 http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/#comment-1621 However, the more heated the "tough love" gets, my tolerance for the tough love definitely decreases. However, the more heated the “tough love” gets, my tolerance for the tough love definitely decreases.

]]> By: Jackie http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/comment-page-1/#comment-1620 Jackie Thu, 14 May 2009 14:41:51 +0000 http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/#comment-1620 Interesting post, Ryan. Something I've never spent a whole lot of time thinking about. Personally, I think that I'm worse at dishing out the tough love than taking it. I think playing sports a lot growing up (and having my dad as a coach for some of them) helped me learn that tough love is meant to help you learn and grow. For me, though, showing others tough love is always a little unsettling because I can never be sure how they will react to it and I don't want them to think I'm just trying to be an a$$. Interesting post, Ryan. Something I’ve never spent a whole lot of time thinking about. Personally, I think that I’m worse at dishing out the tough love than taking it. I think playing sports a lot growing up (and having my dad as a coach for some of them) helped me learn that tough love is meant to help you learn and grow.

For me, though, showing others tough love is always a little unsettling because I can never be sure how they will react to it and I don’t want them to think I’m just trying to be an a$$.

]]> By: Jamie Favreau http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/comment-page-1/#comment-1619 Jamie Favreau Thu, 14 May 2009 14:12:04 +0000 http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/#comment-1619 I don't handle it well. I think I handle changing things in my life when I hit the tolerance level of where I know things need to change and to just take the leap. You can't live in idle and I see my friend doing all the things wrong and not going anywhere. So I guess I might use that as a spring board. I don’t handle it well. I think I handle changing things in my life when I hit the tolerance level of where I know things need to change and to just take the leap.

You can’t live in idle and I see my friend doing all the things wrong and not going anywhere. So I guess I might use that as a spring board.

]]> By: Stuart Foster http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/comment-page-1/#comment-1618 Stuart Foster Thu, 14 May 2009 13:17:33 +0000 http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/how-to-handle-tough-love/#comment-1618 I internalize, assess the situation/advice, and enact the best plan I can to move forward. Most of this involves some manner revenge scheming (to show them how wrong they were) and then move on and try to apply the lesson (if one existed) to my everyday life. This of course is meaningless if the advice came straight out of the person's ass. Which it occasionally does. I internalize, assess the situation/advice, and enact the best plan I can to move forward. Most of this involves some manner revenge scheming (to show them how wrong they were) and then move on and try to apply the lesson (if one existed) to my everyday life.

This of course is meaningless if the advice came straight out of the person’s ass. Which it occasionally does.

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